This was the result of a rather strange request - would I write a short story for a Dutch magazine called 'Panorama'. Yes I would. Hold on - will there be money? There will? How much? Yes I definitely will.
And then I did a wee web search to find out what kind of magazine it was. And lo and behold, was presented with a veritable plethora of young ladies in their scanties. Hurrah! Well, if Alastair Campbell can write for Penthouse Forum, I can write for Panorama. Plus it sounds like a late night serious news programme on BBC2, and that can't be a bad thing when you're trying to explain to your wife why someone from the Netherlands is sending you magazines full of partially-naked ladies.
Er, it's got great articles ... in Dutch ... which I can't read... Ahem.
It has a nice wholesome first line as well:
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